Starting remote at a new firm tomorrow after taking 3 weeks between jobs as parental leave after my wife had a baby. Can’t help but feel guilty about leaving her to take care of the little one all day and all night with less help from me (we asked parents to wait bc of covid). Anyone else dealt with feelings like this going back after parental leave?

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

Daughter just turned 5 months …it sucks but be glad you are still remote. take a break when you can and help the wife out. Do bath time at night and take care of bed time, have dinner with your wife and then get back to work. ….good luck and kick ass!

likesmart

My husband went back to remote work after a month of parental leave. Little breaks/check-ins throughout the day (even just 5-15 minutes) really helped. I could use the restroom, do little chores, or just rest. It also helped break up the day. Highly recommend you pencil it into your calendar.

like

I echo all of the above!

My significant other gave birth right before the pandemic started. I worked remote for a few weeks to stick around and help out. Then as we know, we were forced to work remote for the better part of a year.

Now that I am back at work in the office (not full time but majority of the time), she often tells me how nice it was when I worked from home because I could pop up and help out whenever.

Never underestimate how much 15 minutes of your time is to allow her to go shower or take care of herself in peace!

It definitely sucks going back, but just try your best to be helpful when you are around (and especially on weekends). I’ll admit that sometimes it’s tough because you feel that your weekend should also be a break for you, but now, it’s actually a break for your significant other because you can help out.

Love having a kid though and cannot wait for #2 this fall!

like

It is challenging but no guilt. You are doing your part. What helps is if she has any other new mothers near here. That was immensely helpful for me. Yes a new mother’s group is a must!

like

Thank you all for your responses! I’ll take the advice on helping out for 10-15 mins throughout the day and encourage her to connect with other new mothers. She’s already found someone nearby who has an 8 month old so that’ll be a good start.

Related Posts

A different kind of working mom post:

Many of you have young kids... are there any moms of teens here?

I am at a point where my teen's newfound "independence" is starting to impact my focus and time at work - his running off to hang with friends without permission, etc is becoming a distraction during the workday, and the impact has definitely been noticed by my superiors at work.

The issues with the kid are being handled appropriately - this is more about how to overcome perception at work

like

My company is in need of a update online, could use your opinions! We need to better showcase our culture (caring, supportive, fun, intelligent IT industry leaders) as well as diversity. We are predominantly white still but making strides to improve here. What’s the best way to approach? I don’t want to seem disingenuous or that we are singling out our diverse employees (asking for photos). We have a remote and on-site workforce about 350+ EEs. Non white EEs make up about 35% of the company rn.

like

Hello People,
Looking for advice based on experience. Currently living with in-laws that have come to support us with our first baby. My in-laws and I have had a rocky start to our relationship due to ours being an inter-religion marriage. Many things have been said that I’m neither able to forgive nor forget. I have a very kind husband who understands my sentiments but wants to try to have a cordial relationship with them now for the sake of our baby (and baby’s relationship with grandparents)

like

Tech salaries in Lisbon (Portugal), anything to share?

I'll start: 100kEUR/year gross as Senior PM, fully remote.

like

Based on your own experience or that of your friends, how would you rate Accenture, Big 4, Cognizant, Capgemini within Singapore and SEA? Looking for a holistic take considering brand, quality of work, compensation, WLB, culture etc.

like

So my bipolar dad got declined for a mortgage because disability gets shut off in < 3 years when he turns 65. So now he wants me to co-sign for him. Between housing markets being up, my concerns over his money mgmt, and concerns over tying up my credit there’s no way I can say yes. He sold his house before being approved for the new one he put in for (against my advice). I know he won’t understand and will take this personally, and the family will probably take his side. Gonna be a long week…

like

Any recommendations for an ob-gyn or tips for finding one on short notice in Vancouver? Friend who is trying to get pregnant just moved there from the US and is having a hard time finding someone! TIA!

like

Has anyone had an FET cycle canceled due to high estrogen? My estrogen was at 338. The ultrasound detected a hormone producing cyst. Our RE thinks the cyst should be resolved in the next cycle or two. We've been ttc for our second child and it's been one set back after another.

like

How's your work life balance with current organization? and what has been your experience with previous employers comparatively(if any).

Tata Consultancy Infosys Barclays Deloitte India Deloitte Deutschebank Accenture India Genpact Google BNY Mellon | Pershing Capgemini Citi Cognizant HCL Technologies Wipro Goldman Sachs Amazon India Accenture Larsen & Toubro Infotech Morgan Stanley JPMorgan Chase Credit Suisse HSBC India Hexaware Technologies Dell EY KPMG India PwC

Post Photo
like

I'm a Pharmacy Technician in tge impatient pharmacy at a local large hospital. I have a busy expensive 8 year old. I would love to work from home. Are there any opportunities for Pharmacy Technicians to work from home and still make a good salary?

Hi,

Please help me to choose from below two.
1.
Valuelabs
2. R Systems
Yoe and tech :- Java Springboot, 3.5 years
Both are providing wfh and same package
Need to join tomorrow.
TIA

like

Looking at a remote AWS job, is the starting salary stated for Colorado actually a realistic salary? Principal role but starting at $108K?

like
like

Looking for experienced recruiters. Remote available.

like

Is it a red flag as a candidate to ask if a company offers maternity leave? I was recently laid off, so I wasn't expecting to lose my job. We're planning on trying for a baby in the next year or so, so it's really important to me that my next job offers paid maternity leave.

The issue is that it's so rarely advertised on company web sites, but ultimately better maternity leave would sway my decision for a job. Is there a way to ask this tactfully? Or without raising red flags?

Any ideas on how to negotiate a delayed start date? I really want it to be Jan. My mental health needs some time off and this company breezed through interviews to offer in 1 week when I was expecting it to take at least a month. I really need some time to recover from burnout.

like

Need advise, My ABCD boy friend is asking to have a vacation in one of the lifestyle / open relationship resort in Cancun. I have never been to this kind of relationship and don’t know.. contd..

Hi fishes, I have 2 offers-
Thermo Fisher for Data Engineer in AWS and Python and Ameriprise as Lead Developer for Informatica Powercenter. Ameriprise is offering 50k more in my monthly salary than Thermo Fisher. My preference is to join in where I can grow and get a good learning for future career growth. Also, work life balance should be good in the organization.
Please help me with making a clear decision. And i have 8+ YOE.

like

More Posts

I’m a recent grad interested in becoming a programmatic AM. Anyone out there who would be willing to do a quick phone informational interview with me? There are some Q’s that articles don’t answer

What do you use in your classroom for intervention ?

like

Failed series 63 because I took it very lightly. Cleared 79. Starting as an Associate soon. How bad is it?

like

Is LV monogram tacky? Checking out the vintage Saint Cloud GM. Also has anyone had this bag?

Post Photo
like

Hi all! For my fellow in-house lawyers, roughly what TC could one expect in-house in SD for a commercial/tech/contracts attorney with 8 YOE? I’m currently working in-house in the Bay Area and trying to get a sense of how compensation compares in SD. I miss the beach!

TFW someone rewrites your work, and suddenly it’s no longer funny.

like

What are some general warm-up prompts that can be applied to different texts & get students' wheels turning before a lesson or discussion?

like

I'm seeking information about salary or pay rates for office manager and or office lead in Duluth Georgia.
Job tasks and duties such as parts ordering, service coordinating, inventory, pick ups, routing service vehicles, onboarding and training new employees,
Reconciling cash drawers and deposits, AR report,tax exempt report, billing disputes, de-escalation.
All things customer related and I'm fluent in all rolls of leadership.

like

What are your tips and tricks to tackle providing anticipatory guidance about sensitive topics? It can be challenging to discuss obesity or hygiene with some patients.

like

I am so crabby the 4 days leading up to my period starting. I’m super tired and snap at everyone. I feel terrible for my kids. Does anyone take a vitamin or something to relieve PMS? I already exercise regularly and eat healthy. Please help!!!

like

How do you move up the chain as a CRA? From 75% traveling to 100% remote role or maybe 20% travel. Any suggestion on remote roles in clinical research where CRA experience is appreciated?

How is the Hedge Fund tax group at Deloitte? NY office specifically. Thanks!

like

I’ve been sick the past few weeks but it’s finally clearing up and I can enjoy the subtleties in my collection again. Tonight’s pour is the 06.1 Octomore. It’s like Oban, Lagavulin, and Talisker had a love-child.

Post Photo
like

I could really, really use some positive stories! Please share something that’s making you smile or laugh right now.

like

How does one get into a hospital position with no hospital experience?

like

PwCers - Does anyone know if the Wealth Builder Plan can later be rolled into your employer's 401(k) plan when you switch jobs?

like

Hi everyone! I started this bowl as a safe space for conservative teachers who feel marginalized in an increasingly liberal environment. I have been called every name in the book for my political ideology and have been ostracized by colleagues I’ve known and been friends with for years. This is a please to have respectful and honest conversations about our experiences. WELCOME!

like

Short Disney and Apple? Already holding Apple shorts.

like

How come PWC SDC pays more than PWC India? Also, can anyone tell me between DDV and Strategy which is good? Considering that max engagements in PWC are DD based is there any strategy being done in SDC?

like

Additional Posts in Law

For transactional attorneys, when did you finally start to feel like your draft documents were less redlined? Cant help but feel like my documents are heavily redlined but I really am trying my best.

like

What are average billable hours for L&E attorneys? TIA!

like

Hi, everyone! I am extremely passionate about issues such as climate change and gun violence, and how money in politics leads to inaction and disinformation regarding these issues. Does anyone have any insight as to where I should be looking for employment opportunities? Practice areas, the type of organization, traditional vs. non-traditional law jobs? Any help or guidance would be appreciated. I really want to make a change. Thank you!

like

Does your firm deal well with associates who need religious accommodations? If e.g. they’re observing Shabbat, do you always make sure to have at least someone on the team who isn’t? Are you even allowed to ask? Pardon my ignorance.

like

After you’ve pulled an all-nighter, how do you get through the next day? Caffeine? Exercise? Take a nap? Quit early?

like

I feel myself slipping into a deep depression. I hate this job but I don’t know what other skills I have to leave it. Not really a question more of just a confession I guess.

like

I am a Legal Director of Commercial at a later stage start up (series E). I have 6 years of legal counsel experience, 2 in my current role. I am due for a stock refresh for additional RSUs (I’ve been at my company for 3+ years) but not sure what’s market to ask for. Any ideas or resources to refer to?

likehelpful

Average time between interview and offer? If long (over a month), should you assume the opportunity is dead in the water?

like

I hear a lot about people saying they'd like to go into banking. But most of the time it seems like they really mean PE, which seems like a long shot to me

like

If you could do a regular job outside of the law what would you do?

like

Any advice for dealing with repeated job rejections (after several rounds of interviews)? I try not to take it personally but it’s really been a blow to my ego.

like

Interested in hearing about so-called “lifestyle” firms. Names, typical hours, comp, markets, etc.

like

How do you make time for interviews while dealing with all the work you’re fleeing from at your current firm where partners expect to see everyone in person full time?

like

Does anyone feel their practice area is fun and/or exciting? I’m a commercial litigator and yes I have a wide variety of cases but it’s becoming kind of redundant. I’ve always had an interest in business, finance, investments etc. (private equity and stock market) and was wondering what practice would be best to merge the two?Any suggestions or comments on what you find to be an enjoyable practice area?

like

Ever finish a draft so late you wait until the morning to email it to the Partner? (Why am I sweating an arbitrary Friday deadline?)

like

Is anybody in the house at one of the big four accounting firms? They keep advertising legal counsel roles and I'm just curious about what the work is like/ what the work life balance is. I'm primarily interested in non tax rolls if they exist in that organization

likehelpful

Anyone in this bowl did the CAMS exam? If so, is this an exam that can be passed without AML experience?

like

Which books would you recommend to a product counel for tech startup about strategy, management, and leadership?

like

When you’re about to give notice but they are bringing you on new client project’s…. Sorry…

like

What unexpected specialities have you all picked up along the way as a junior? Somehow I became the go-to guy on tax assessment appeals because the other guy went in-house.

like

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Send download link to your phone

OR

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy.

Messaging rates may apply

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal