What is everyone’s view on families on a single income with the mom being a stay at home mom or both spouses working? Does it pay off to have your wife at home with the kids or are you better off with both spouses working? Both from a financial and family point of view

like
Posting as :
works at
You are currently posting as works at

I was raised by my stay at home mom until she went back to work when I turned 5 (and my brother was 7). I think it has a lot to do with my growth and success as a human being (professionally and personally). I would love to do this for my kids, but honestly it seems much less practical these days with all costs far outpacing incomes. My dad’s one teacher income was able to raise a family of 4. No chance that could happen in 2024 unfortunately

like

I basically came here to say this. The days of the single income family are long behind us. Your options are now both work or move to Nebraska. You can’t run a single family household on the coastal cities anymore it’s just not feasible with COL

like

My wife is a SAHM and we wouldn’t have it any other way. More quality time with the kids, they aren’t being raised by strangers, and so much less stress when we don’t have to get everyone out the door in time to drop them off at daycare before getting ourselves to work.

And as far as finances go, by the time you factor in a second vehicle and child care, a second income wouldn’t really net much benefit. It might if you are both executives, but for us (me in big tech and her an academic) it won’t make sense for her to go back to work until the kids are in school.

I found it more difficult to work full time while the kids were young <4. Now that my kids are older, I am glad I stayed in the workforce and many of my friends who were SAHM for years find it very difficult to get back into the workforce and most have had to start over at the bottom. My kids didn't always like it when they were very young. Now they are way more independent than most of their friends because I needed them to help out more. The best case IMHO is to be a SAHM for a few years and then go back to work (assuming you can find work at the same level) or work part-time while the kids are young. Unfortunately, the truth is most moms struggle to get back into the workforce without starting over.

I stayed home for three years when we had our first child, and it worked well for us. I was an elementary teacher only making $33k, and it didn’t make sense financially to spend over half of my salary on daycare. I used this time at home to earn my masters degree then went back to work with a much more flexible job with higher pay that fits our family needs. I don’t regret that choice for a second and had no trouble getting a job when returning to work either. I was not raised by a SAHM and neither was my husband, but it is common in my area/demographic for moms to stay home or only work very part time during early childhood.

Related Posts

Hi Fishes,
Please suggest a good project for java and spring boot developer in ibm ..Am looking for good tech stack and WLB

like

Went from a big firm to work for a smaller firm. The people in the smaller firm are protective of their work and are good by their work too. I no longer feel chaos or stress. I am treated with respect and my schedule is more normal. I am even working more billable hours than before, but it feels like a seamless experience. I don’t work then past 5pm or anything out of the ordinary for this time of the year. I am so grateful!

likeuplifting

How many billable hours per week is considered at capacity? I’m getting pushback on boundaries I’m setting about additional matters and marketing work from my firm when I’ve been billing 60-75 hours per week for the last 6 weeks, and I’m still behind on my work. I feel like it’s reasonable to not kill myself further to fit in more/turn things around faster at this point, but am I being unreasonable? I expect my workload to remain at this level through the end of the year at least.

like

Looking to move to San Antonio and we're looking at places in Alta Vista and El Dorado. Pros and cons? We have two kids under five, so looking for a nice family community with good schools.

like

Thinking about switching to IFS. Currently in consulting. What’s your WLB?

like

How do I deal with minimal support from our principal when it comes to dealing with parents?

like

Hello fishes of LTI!
How is WLB in LTI. I am joining LTI next month currently working in Capgemini. WLB in Capgemini was good. Can I expect the same in LTI?

like

Any new dads out there just want a chill 9-5 job and spend more time with the kids? I’m 35 and the rat race is killing me and I’m valuing time with family more than money at this point.

likeuplifting
like

How do i find out if I will be happier divorced or more unhappily staying married. 2 kids; 2 & 4 YO. They don’t hear the arguments after bed time and don’t understand the bruises yet but I know it’s just a matter of time. It would be so much harder not seeing my kids everyday than living with the pain, loneliness and lost friendships. But I’m tired. And so sad. Lost. So alone. Does anyone have something that turned it around? He changed? You changed so he did? Ayahuasca retreat maybe?

like

Doing a federal clerkship and thinking of my options after. Anyone in NJ/NY/PA biglaw lit group with collegial and pleasant work environment? I do not care about billable requirements/workload, just salary and don’t want to be treated like shit.

like

Considering a move to UAE and Inhave to major questions:
- How is the SC work life balance?
- I am coming from Europe, is there a big cultural shock?

Thanks!

like

So much workload here.. working almost 12-16hrs a day.. planing to leave..

like

What’s WLB like in business roles at Google?

like

Brand new (like, just-had-a-kid new) mom here. Life seems manageable with the baby sleeping much of the time. It gets worse from here doesn’t it? I’m scared 😱😱😱

like

I'm going from working at a non IT industry to an IT firm. As an introvert I've faced a lot of difficulty in my career... Now since I'm also shifting to another industry completely, I'm feeling very insecure about my life at work. Please give me tips on how to make friends and be in the good books of the managers.

like

I’m curious to know if anyone has experience working part-time in architecture? I have been working for large international firms in NYC for the past 10 years. So I work all day every day. My evenings and often the weekends are all absorbed by work duties. Working part-time would allow me to find a better balance, and carve out space for side gigs and eventually start my own firm. Any recommendations?

like

Is bfs account Contract get extended or they simply release and we get bach to parent (cts), for another project is complete bgv happening or they just handle from their side?

like

Hi Fishes,

I just received an offer from CTS -16.45LPA
16 - Fixed & 45k variable component with 1Lakh joining bonus. I'm having 5.8 YOE working as Senior ACon with current CTC - 11lpa
I have cleared 2nd round(managerial) with TCS direct project recruitment and waiting for salary negotiation. I'm confused whether to join TCS now itself (which might be too soon to settle down) or go for CTS for next 2 years. Please suggest me. My priorities are Steady growth, Work life balance, Job security.

like

Tired of being stressed no wlb. I really want to transition to mission-driven work. I’ve started interviewing with orgs I’m super excited about but pay is much less. How much pay cut is too much?

More Posts

Does anyone have experience working for Connections Academy or another virtual academy? I am very interested in teaching from home, but most virtual jobs I have reviewed still require you to come to an office/ school building. I want to know what it is like, specifically the work load. Would you say more or less than public? How does classroom management, amount of grading, and freedom of curriculum differ?

like

Has anyone heard anything new on the future of MDC and its agencies in 2019?

like

Can someone remind me what it's like to be in public and not in busy season? My brain can't go back 9 months

likefunny

Mercedes-Benz Research & Development India What laptop and welcome kit Mercedes-Benz Research & Development India will give for senior consultant (full stack developer) , I'm joining may 9

Please reply

like

First year post my consulting exit and I’m dreading the inevitable dwindling of my points… is this what separation anxiety feels like

likefunny

Hello Fishes, Can please someone tell me what are some of the nodal drop points for cabs for Morgan Stanley employees? Need to know for reallocation planning. Thanks Morgan Stanley

like

Based on the recent event of George Floyd’s murder/police brutality, what do others think? Most of the church is silent when it comes to these issues and not sure why. Curious to know others thoughts regardless of your race/ethnic background.

like

McKinsey & Company What’s the latest comp at McKinsey & Company for Associates?

How can entry-level candidates stand out during the interview process?

like

So I recently learned about the Boston Molasses Disaster. Apparently, due to a lack of oversight, some giant molasses storage unit exploded into a wave that flooded the streets of Boston with millions of gallons of molasses causing massive damage to people and property. How crazy is that?? What are other historic engineering accidents worth looking into?

like

What is UBS Associate Director salary in Non IT Pune role with 15 yrs of experience.

Hello .. Anyone joining UBS on 31st October in Pune location?

Down as well - also, isn't the whole point of the bowl to not have to coordinate emails and all that? Easier to do it on here no?

Can anyone send me invites/codes to the EY and KPMG bowls?

like

Hii all
I have 3 year of experience. Skill. Java backend developer.
Ibm is offering 13+1.5jb, 6b band application de
I have another offer 15fixed+1.5jb.
Will ibm match the offer letter?
Please reply.
TIA

like

Amazons excessive interviews are an awful candidate experience. Why do they think this will help them win top talent in this competitive environment? Especially with their public cultural issues…? Lots of great paying companies without having to take a day off from work to interview! It’s overkill

like

Is there such place as non toxic ID firm? Or does any of ID attys like what they do? I moved from general practice to an ID firm six months ago. Biggest mistake of my life. I am trying hard not to just quit and walk away as I’m battling head cold but still have to bill bill bill and get criticized for not billing right and etc and cases being piled up - while everyone is looking forward to the long weekend. I seriously question my judgement. Need word of wisdom just to get through this hellhole

like

Yikes! Some days, I just can’t stand my job

likefunny

Does PWC India consider counter offer or drop the candidature if they cannot match the CTC?

like

Additional Posts in Personal Finance Bowl

Currently maxing out my 401k and HSA and investing about 1k/mo in ETFs. Also recently started buying I-bonds given inflation. What are other things I should be thinking about?

like

I stopped contributing to my 401K for the last three months in order to pay off credit card debt. I am 28 and have about 68K in my 401K. Was this a smart decision? I want to get out of debt as quickly as possible and I have no student loans or car debt.

like

I make 135k gross/year & am looking at apartments in a tier 2 city. 2k for a 1 bedroom or 3k for a 2 bedroom? I’ll be working from home and living by myself & a pup. The hesitancy is 3k is basically one of my paychecks after taxes. I live frugally otherwise with the exception of eating at a nice restaurant once a week. Is a two bedroom worth it?

like

24 yr old, 110k TC, maxing out Roth IRA and Roth 401k, no debt or large expenses. Also have ~35k sitting in a bank account. What should I do with that money?? Am I better just sitting on it for a while then watching it shrivel up in my brokerage account?

like

I have a LOT of credit card debt. It has just grown over time and I can’t find my way out. I’m considering debt consolidation, specifically a company called National Debt Relief which seems legit but I’m just so hesitant because I’m scared to make my situation worse. Or a personal loan to pay off all the CC debt and then have a smaller all in one payment. I’m intelligent and I work in finance, it’s so embarrassing. HELP.

like

Best ETF to invest in? I’m 24 looking to invest about $50k and don’t know where to put it. Nothing that’s super high cost or risky please

like

Hi - AMEX sign up bonus is higher than ever. DM me if you would like a referral link, I’ll split my bonus with you as well :)

I racked up about $20k in credit card debt due to a confluence of things happening at once (move, school expenses , etc ). I have a fair amount of paper assets but not a much free cash. Assets are down a decent amount with the current market cycle and I’d prefer not to sell them to cover the debt , although they easily could. Any suggestions how to handle the credit card debt without racking up tons of ongoing card interest?

like

Newly minted consultant here looking for financial advice.

So I just moved to consulting after B school, and It's more money than I've made my entire life. After paying for rent and living expenses, I have 6000$ left over every month. My student loan payments are about 1200/month at 7% interest. I still owe another 95K on my loan. I have the option to pay more every month and reduce my overall interest paid.
Currently I put about 3000 towards my loan and 3000 towards my savings. Cont'd...

like

Have an acquaintance who is a single mom; she purchased a used car 3 mos ago. Six wks later her 17yo wrecked it, air bags deployed, and estimates have ranged between $10-$18k in needed repairs while $21k is still owed. Acquaintance was switching insurance policies and flubbed the coverage dates and there were a few days where the vehicle was uninsured. No GAP insurance. I'm not seeing many options for her besides to continue pmts, fixing just enough to drive or voluntary repo. Thoughts?

like

I'm a long time user of mvelopes budgeting software, and we just got a notice that they're shutting the platform down at the end of the year.

Looking for a recommendation for an "envelope based" replacement. They suggested Every Dollar, but it doesn't handle credit cards well.

like

My boyfriend and I make 200K combined and live in NJ. We have $1000 in monthly car payments combined. That’s all we owe. Our credit scores are in the 800s. We have 50K to put down on a home. We have done the math and I know we can afford much more but he doesn’t want to buy more than a 400K home. I’m almost positive we can afford 500K and be more than ok. But then he starts to talk about how much kids cost and how we will be house poor and we won’t be able to afford kids. 🤔 Am I insane??

like

Seeking feedback on GAP insurance. I had a family member who purchased a car in June or July. They were in an accident last week and it sounds like the car will be declared a total loss. Never dealt with this before, so wanted to ask if anyone has ever had an instance where the insurance didn't cover the outstanding balance of the loan and the insured then owed money? Car was $35k, $7k down, finance $28k. Gap insurance is through lender, not auto insurer.

I am 25 years old with roughly no savings. I am a consultant with a technical background. Are there any tips in side jobs/ways to make more money for savings?

like

What's the best 529plan? Heard Vanguard Nevada plan is popular due to low fee, or NY state one gives tax benefits upto $10k (but not sure if it matters for NJ residents working in NYC). What's the criteria for deciding 529?

like

Why do 403b have such I fees? I almost want to stop contributing all together or just minimum 6% to meet the match. Possibly just rely on the pension but what if it’s underfunded when I retire?

Anyone have a recommended tax person in Chicago?

like

Live in a HCOL area. Looking to buy in the next year. The least I can afford to buy would put a mortgage at 40% of my monthly take home pay (post tax + max out 401k) but 25% of gross income. Will 40% of take home pay make me house poor?

like

For those of you that currently pay 30% of gross income towards rent, do you still have money to save? I’m moving to NYC and am used to paying only 15%. Pay is now 125k base so I’m looking for apartments around 2800-3k

like

Vanguard Digital Advisor ( 4 ETFs, 0.15% fee) vs HSBC Financial Advisor (15-20 funds, 1.5% fee) which one to go for nest egg growth 100k starting

New to Fishbowl?

Download the Fishbowl app to
unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.
That was just a preview…
Sign Up to see all discussions
  • Discover what it’s like to work at companies from real professionals
  • Get candid advice from people in your field in a safe space
  • Chat and network with other professionals in your field
Sign up in seconds to unlock all discussions on Fishbowl.

Already a user?
Login here

Share

Embed this post

Copy and paste embed code on your site

Preview

Download the
Fishbowl app

See what’s happening in your industry
from the palm of your hand.

A phone with Fishbowl app

Scan your QR code to download
Fishbowl app on your mobile

Download app

Sign up for free to view this conversation on Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use and Privacy Policy

Already have an account? Log in

Sign up for free to continue using Fishbowl

By continuing you agree to Terms of Use(New) and Privacy Policy(New)
Messaging rates may apply

Already have an account? Log in

For account settings, visit Fishbowl on Desktop Browser or

General

Legal