He left 3 weeks ago. He’s still my first thought every morning, and I think about him for hours everyday. Normal? When does it go away?

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At the natural juncture. For some lucky people that’s a week, and for others like me it can take years. There will be suffering but the degree of which is largely up to you to DECIDE.
My advice, you should rest and reflect and then go play the field and be young with friends immediately. From experience, a past relationship almost destroyed me and I was losing hope until a friend introduced me to a friend of his girlfriend at the bar maybe 6 months later. It was the most amazing / romantic one night stand you wouldn’t think possible and we couldn’t stop talking until past sunrise. No relationship ever came of it due to timing but it breathed life into me in ways that seemed unfathomable at the time (literally felt like I returned to the living). I’m positive life will present you with some type of inflection point like that when you are ready too

likeuplifting

You give me hope.

It took me a year and a half to recover from a 5 year relationship. Went completely no-contact, he reached out to via email several times and got no response from me. It was SO worth it. Stay strong! Onwards and upwards!

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Watch funny videos, Stephen Colbert, Seth Myers, SNL. No pills of any kind. Did do calming teas, massage packages through Deloitte Wellness coverage, yoga membership and travel, both international and domestic.

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Totally normal. When you’re ready to let it go.

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It’s been a month for me, and I still wake up everyday thinking about him :( the pain has been less sharp and more dull and achy. I listened to a podcast that said meditation (10 mins, even if you’re in bed) is helpful. Also journaling - thoughts and gratitude

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For me it took 2 months (to be fair we only dated 2 months but it was intense and I was really sad). I still think of them but not in a longing, sad way. More like wtf was I thinking lol. Lexapro also helped with my obsessive thoughts.

With time it will go away. It’s only been 3 weeks, so it’s very fresh AND the holiday season makes things really hard. I’m sorry you’re going through this. But it will get better ❤️❤️

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When I had my first heartbreak, I literally didn't sleep the first night. Just laid on my bed until the sunrise came from my window. I missed his good morning messages and the guy I spoke to everyday. A few days later, I was on a dating app, met up with a guy, said I was down to hook up. A week later when I had to go hookup with this stranger, I canceled and said I realized I wasn't over him. I had to leave my home because everything reminded me of him. Him showering and brushing his teeth at my home. Him cooking food with me. Him working at my desk.

I went to my grandparents home and lived there for a week. They were delighted to see me, but had no idea why I spent a week with them. My heart was so broken, but that week away helped. Two weeks had passed and I began to focus on me again. I missed him dearly. Two months later, we hung out. Truthfully, it took me 9 months to get over him completely.

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I don’t know if the thoughts ever go away but they’ll become less. Give yourself time to wallow and then start filling your time with other things. Start small and then start making big plans. You’ll get excited for your life again and be able to turn this corner.

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What are you doing for you? How are you taking care of yourself and growing? It will be there but focus on you and it will help. It’s been 3 months and I still have those moments but it will go away.

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OP- how’re you doing/feeling?

OP, good for you! ❤️ it’s not easy to solo travel - especially when dealing with heartbreak. I hope you are able to find peace and heal!

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Additional Posts in Heartbreak Help

I hope he’s in as much pain as I am. The way he ended it was so cold and selfish and unlike how he was any other time with me. It was like a personality switch. I’ve never been so wrong about someone. I’m not sure how to process or recover from that part of it.

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It’s been 5 weeks and I haven’t gone a day or night without crying and feeling haunted by them. I can’t eat, can’t sleep, can’t produce quality work, can’t find joy in anything I previously loved. This is the worst physical and psychological pain I’ve ever experienced.

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I made a mistake. I talked with the ex this morning. He said he misses me. And that while he walk talking to the other woman, he wished he was talking to me instead. And when he saw that I didn’t respond to his texts, he drank a shit ton. And then called this morning.

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I need to block him.

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likehelpful

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I’m so happy this bowl exists 🥹🫶🏼

likeuplifting

I felt like a walking zombie during thanksgiving, barely eating and barely talking. My family is small and I told them ahead of time my relationship ended. I focused on my niece and nephews, cried when I wanted to and slept from 8pm-noon for the last 5 days. Showered once or twice. That’s the best I could do and that’s OK right now. I’m back in my apartment, just trying to take it one day at a time, and not re read his texts too much. My birthday is Thursday 🙄

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I hate that I still want to hear from him. I just have no idea what I want him to say or what I want to say. I feel like if I get anywhere near him he’ll be able to sense my pain. Are we sure the no contact rule is only 21 days? I feel like I need 21 months.

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